This week was really a toxic one for me, to think na it was my FIRST week.. Haay, things are getting complicated talaga or should I say hindi pa kasi ako nakakapag-adjust!? 3^rd year was really a difficult one.. Anyway, the good thing was, Monday was really a good start for the week à NO CLASS. I had an extension of cleaning my room, fixing my stuff and making a scrapbook of myself but still, I went to my condo at around 11pm.. My first day funk (lets do the 1^st day funk!) was really a memorable one.. I went to school at around 7am but my classes would start at 8am, isn’t it obvious that im excited!? mega-chika-to-the-max talaga.. you know what happened? the school announced that our subjects for that day would start next week, that’s one thing I hate about late announcements, so we (me, anj, terj, elaine, marchy and charlotte) ended up going to glorietta as early as 10am, oh diba what a first day funk!? we had lunch at food choices and supposed to watch a movie but we ended up discussing issues for our 2 weeks vacation, haaay life! from 10am to 3pm we were just laughing and sharing so many things and then I met up with kurt at around 3pm and we bought stuff for his RLE orientation, injections and stuff.. we ate at mcdo bago niya ko hinatid ulit sa condo.. Wednesday – NO CLASS!! I went home (qc) at around 10 am kc nagpacheck-up ako and then went to the mall with mom, manunuod sana kami ng monster in law pero next week pa showing! I went back to the condo at around 11pm.. i woke up 4am the next day (thursday) kc I have duty, 5:30 call time, omigod! they taught us how to suction and we also had our return demonstration, I went home around 3pm, im so damn tired!! the next day (friday) was also a tiring one, they taught us about enema, catheterization and draping and had again return demonstration, sobrang nakakakaba to do that, ang scary pa naman ng c.i naming, haay, had lunch with kurt and hinintay niya ako hanggang matapos class ko.. umuwi muna ako sa condo to change my clothes and headed to his tita’s house sa Guadalupe.. sobrang kwentuhan and dun na kami nag-dinner, went home at around 10:30pm, im super tired.. and yesterday (saturday) was the most unforgettable day for me.. injection was the topic, they taught us how to inject and we had our return demonstration with our partner, charlotte was my partner.. we did intramascular and skin testing, I was very nervous at first but super fun.. we were dismissed early so I went home early to fix my things.. nakatulog ako sa hapon and dumating sundo namin at around 6pm, nakauwi ako dito sa house mga around 7:30pm..

ang super init ng weather grabe.. nagpapahinga ako to the max coz this coming week would really be a tiring one.. start of duty at makatimed and my c.i’s really strict, wish me luck, haay!

im starting to hate the world, yeah, I DO.. i dont know what to say.. i dont have someone to talk to right now.. kaya eto, cguro tabulas lang ang makikinig sakin..

everybody knows "you cant please everybody", i do believe in that and i proved that today.. what the f**ck!! im a good person pero pag napuno, EWAN,. tao lang ako, napapagod din,, grbe, naghigh blood ata ako to the nth power to the max!! hindi man lang ako nagawang pakinggan? yeah, PRIDE, with ALL CAPS!! bakit ganun..  i am crying while writing this entry, actually nasasaktan ako!!

lesson: wag ng gawan ng problema ang problema.. haaayy..

As i celebrate my 19th birthday, i received an outpouring of love and support, despite of what's really happening (kurt was the only person i told about what happened today, thanks for listening and for the advices, it helped alot).. but one simple message touched my heart and summed up all my 19 years of existence here on earth.. "wag mo i-down sarili mo, wag kang bibitaw.. isipin mo na kelangan mong maging matatag, andito lang ako, di kita iiwan".. for me, that was the reason, the purpose of all that i'd been doing all those years and would be doing in the years ahead.. i almost hate the world, i admit it im honest but he gave me the reason to smile and be happy today.. thanks hon for making my day.. because of you, my day turned out to be my birthday..

here are some texts i received from the people who are close to my heart..♥♥♥ the people who never fails to remember..

my makatimed family:

kurt: happy birthday to you my honey.. dont forget to pray and thank the lord for everything.. iloveyou so much -pu (iloveyoutoo!)

lea and ross: happy birthday!!

rain: happy bday nins!wish u ol d bst. im alwys hir.. take care.. god bless.. luv ya.. mwuah..

benj: happy birthday. im always hir 4u!wish u ol d bst and hapines in lyf!mwha!ingats lgi and god bless!

gaile: happy birthday dude!!

claire: hapi bday!mwah!lov u!

ria: ei nins, hapy bday!take care aleays.. im here for u palague ok.mwuah!!

dannie: happy bday! may u continue 2b a blessing 2 a lot of pipol.. enjoy ur day!god bles u nd uu loved ones..

dzienn: hapi bday! wah u ol d hapnes nd peace of mind u deserve. mwuah.luv yah!

pat: nena, hapy hapy! 2mtnda kna pro sexy at pretty ka ptn.. god bless s studies nd s inyo n rn po ni kurt,. miss k n ikaw, d2 lng ako f u nid help. hapybday..

nikki: happy birthday!!

faye: hapy bday nine.wsh u all d best..im always here foe u.stay as u are.mwuah loveyou

tanya: hapi burdeee! take care!

my high school friends..

tami: hapi hapi bday!treat namn jan,haha.wel,may u hav a blessed day 2day.. godbless.. mis u nd luv yah

roan: happee burtdau!tanda m na! hehe..

glohrie: happy bday.wsh u gud health,success nd mre hapines 2 come. take care always.. god bless u!

katrina: happy birthday.. (from YM)

conrad: happy happy birthday!!

ruggah: HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! yngat lagi.. mwuah!!

matet: hapy bday po. tc.

jed: happy birthday, minamahal kong kaibigan (testi sa friendster)

and more...

eubie: happy bday ninang.. (my pamangkin and inaanak)

ate joan: happy birthday sis! (family friend)

achee: happy bday!may u hav mny mre bdays 2 come.wsh u ol d best. bsta no mater wat m hr lang. lovyah.mwuah (my cousin)

ate daisy: happy birthday qtiee nina! wsh u all d bst in lyf!!luv u!!(kuya's gf)

ate zsa: happy brthday! gudlck s lhat ng pnpursue m.god bless.(cousin)

THANKS SA INYONG LAHAT.. u made me happy.. and sa mga hindi nag-greet, e ano naman, harhar..  haaaay...

love is the only reason for our existence. love is the reason for all that we are doing.. without love, we are empty.. i am proud to say that i am not empty and i do exist!! got it?

HAPPY BITHDAY GAILE..

I went to school and meet up with kurt at around 10am.. I got my grades and finally, I enrolled, my sched was Monday to Saturday, 6 days straight.. I have my lectures (psycho/patho, health strategy and N-201) during Mondays and Tuesdays and straight 4 days duty, OMIGOD!! I don’t know what would happen to me when class starts, kurt and I have a super opposite sched, hay hay hay, goodluck to us.. the enrolment was super fast kaya we went to glorietta right after.. actually, kurt an I had an argument about our lakad today, hindi kami makapagdecide for the plan, meron naman na talaga pero I don’t know what happened but still, natuloy parin..

we ate sa hotshots and watched movie sa g4 after.. a lot like love was a very nice movie, it was a so-so kilig, ashton was very adorable! I looooooooooove it sobra.. we planned to eat again after the movie pero biglang nabago yung plan, pupunta daw kami sa house nila kasi dadating yung parents nya from out-of-town, period.. so after the movie, we went to greenbelt to buy go nuts donuts para pasalubong pero nilipat daw sa SM Makati kaya we walked from greenbelt all the way to SM makati.. ayun, akala namin pag dating sa house nila andun na parents nya pero wala pa pala, nauna pa kami, pero in a few minutes, dumating narin.. to be honest, nakakamiss talaga yung family nya lalo na yung parents nya, haaaay.. ayun, nagkwentuhan, nag-internet, nanuod ng tv and kumain na naman.. im very happy today!! we left his house at around 8pm.. tinry naming yung daan sa C-5 and mas super ok compare with EDSA.. 1 hr and 10 mins lang from parañaque to qc.. i was super tired, nagkekwentuhan kami about so many things habang nasa biyahe, pero super nashocked ako when he said..

kurt: "hon, im so happy about our relationship, masaya ako sobra..hindi ko alam kung anong reason basta sobrang saya ko ang kuntento"

ako: ha? (pero deep inside kinikilig ako) awwwww!!

kurt: kunyari kapa e, pakipot.. tumingin ka nga sakin..

ako: (tumingin sakanya tapos nagsmile) ako din sobra!!

I wasn’t expecting na babanat siya ng ganun.. sobrang kilig talaga.. haay!! anywee, kahit nambobola sya, well sobrang hundred pogi points,harhar.. grabe diba? i really cant wait 2 years from now.. gusto ko na year 2007 na agad.. basta, andami kong plans pagka-graduate ko, diba hon? thanks sa paghatid sakin..